One hundred years from now, it will not matter what my bank account was, how big my house was, or what kind of car I drove. But the world may be a little better, because I was important in the life of a child. ~Forest Witcraft
Henri Toulous-Lautrec, Le Loge au Mascaron Dore
Item # 12280217 http://www.art.com/
Life is a theater. Invite your audience carefully. Not everyone is emotionally or spiritually healthy & mature enough to have a front row seat in your life. There are people in your life that need to be loved from a distance. Pay attention to who lifts you up & who leans... on you. You cannot change the people around you...... but you can change the people you are around. ~Unknown
Dress Rehearsal, Carolyn Dawn Johnson
Lyrics
Is your life a Comedy or Tragedy?
Theater Masks Item # 12351355 http://www.art.com/
Carnival at Marmorhaus by Josef Fenneker
Item # 10125050A http://www.art.com/
Experience is a hard teacher because she gives the test first, the lesson afterwards. ~Vernon Sanders Law
Pop Quiz Popcorn
Each day in a parent's life is a test. Each day of an autism parent is a series of pop quizzes. Pop! Pop! Pop! Pop-Pop-Pop-Pop-Pop! We spend energy anticipating pops as if we're waiting and watching for popcorn kernels to burst. We delight pops of breakthroughs, euphoric moments. We expect pops of setbacks, anguished moments. We, along with our children pop UP, DOWN, HIGH and LO, TO, and FRO; the sizzling skillet of autism taking us all on a explosive ride.
In other words, a contradiction in terms each moment of every day!
I've been able to handle my two neurotypical children at any age together easier than any stage of G's life since he began walking at 14 months and regressing. Even when at 1 and 3, they'd each zoom off in opposite directions at the grocery store. Even when my infant daughter had colic for 5 long, horrifying months. Even when my older son got frighteningly high fevers for 2 years before I finally demanded - instead of asking - that his tonsils come out. Even when they simultaneously caught the messy flu, screamed, cried, fought over a toy, yanked on my pant-leg, needed a great big hug because they had a rotten day. I've never had discipline or long-term behavior issues with either of them...N and M aren't perfect, they're typical kids. Then along comes my wild child G. Nothing prepared me for this amazing experience. From my perspective, parenting autism equals performing caregiving at ten times neurotypical parenting. I surely can't imagine how parents cope who have physically challenged, non-verbal or multi-challenged children....and many families have more than one handicapped child. I'm awestruck at the thought! Blessings, peace, strength and good karma to all of you.
Famous Words About Parenthood
Having a family is like having a bowling alley installed in your brain. ~Martin Mull
Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body. ~Elizabeth Stone
When my kids become wild and unruly, I use a nice, safe playpen. When they're finished, I climb out. ~Erma Bombeck
In spite of the six thousand manuals on child raising in the bookstores, child raising is still a dark continent and no one really knows anything. You just need a lot of love and luck - and, of course, courage. ~Bill Cosby, Fatherhood, 1986
Progress!
I have exciting news about G this week: he got his first belt tip! A tip marks progress, and students need 4-5 tips to test for the next level belt. He acheived his black tip which is for blocking set; requiring routine, form, attention and focus.!!!! G's been going 4-5 times per week since July, and he's doing great at class participation and taking verbal instruction.
He has a wonderful bond with our local Tae Kwon Do Master, who's extremely patient with G and gets a kick out of him (or several!)...lol. G still has trouble with some of the warm-up exercises that require heavy-duty motor planning: spider walk, crab walk, jumping jacks, push-ups. I love to watch him do push-ups - he gets in proper form, then just bobs his head up and down. I'll have to get a video of that! :}
They have some creative shirt phrases that I haven't seen before. While the graphics and typography are uninspiring, the messages are fun and positive.
T-shirts: Youth $12 Adult $14
Sweatshirts: Youth $20 Adult $22
Check out the monthly specials: today some long sleeve t-shirts and sweatshirts are offered for $5-$6!
I haven't ordered any products yet, so I can't report about quality or service. I'll update when I do...
I peeked in to see if G was sleeping this morning to discover him intently poring over a book, fingers running over the words, moving his lips like he was reading, studying the photos, turning the pages. He did this for 10 minutes, while I called the whole family up individually to watch this wonder through the crack in his door. My turbo-energized boy wouldn't sit still for a whole story a year ago, only started attending to read-aloud books a few months ago, and now he's yearning to read!
My little late bloomer can read a few sight words, but may soon be putting together letters to truly read. I'm thrilled beyond words...pun intended. It's time to pull out the software and dvds, pick up speed and teach him while he's motivated, catch him by storm.
We have hundreds of books for him and from my older children, but G picked out new-to-him nonfiction weather books at a garage sale this week - best $3 spent EVER! ;}
Great read...I couldn't put this book down! The author's writing style is conversational and mirrors many of my own thoughts, fears, emotions. She accurately portrays how autism impacts the WHOLE family, in wonderful and heartbreaking ways. She empathetically characterizes the exhaustive effort, confusion and disappointments for a mother, father, siblings, and extended family of a special needs child.
This book is an excellent choice for a special needs teacher, therapist, family member or family friend of an autistic child. It offers honest insight into the daily disruptions and quirks of autism. Without too much drama or sadness, she uses personal stories to illustrate life for and with an autistic - at home, school and the surrounding community. She also includes a copious dose of funny anecdotes, "Autism-isms" that had me cracking up. As a parent of a son on the spectrum, finding humor in the midst of chaos is indispensible for sanity.
I wouldn't recommend this for a newly diagnosed family. Save it for a year until your head stops spinning so crazily and you secure routines and therapies. It's not a "how to", therapy, program or methodology book. It's an honest delightful story of a family's struggle and triumphs with the puzzle of autism.
I "get it"...this book may help others to "get it" too.
A few weeks ago I had a blocked ear and used ear drops and a bulb syringe to flush out my ears. I repeated the process for 3 days to clear my ear. As expected, G was fascinated with the process and asked lots of questions, watched from every angle, looked at and handled all the equipment carefully.
Tonight as I was helping my daughter with her homework (Mom's preoccupied!), he slammed a kitchen drawer and ran around our well-worn circle pathway - kitchen, hallway, foyer, great room, and back. Round and round he goes.... Stimming: a sure sign that he's up to something.
He stopped to drag a kitchen stool to the sink while excitedly waving a turkey baster. He cranked the water to "blast" mode. I hesitated, then I figured - oh let him play, squirt some water while we conquer story problems.
Next thing I know, my daughter shouts, "No!"
I snap my head around to see G, head tilted, squeezing water from the turkey baster in to his ear!
What a funny photo that would've made if only I'd been prepared! Or not working on left-brained math...
Fresh Approach
Specialized apps are developed daily as word spreads about iPad's revolutionary accessible, intuitive use as a tool for Autism, Speech Apraxia, Sensory Processing, Cerebral Palsy, Physical Impairment, Down Syndrome and other special needs.
Just So Right on So Many Levels
Ipads aren't cheap, but are less costly, more portable and manageable than other communication devices and systems for Autistic learning. Many apps are low-cost or FREE! You don't need special training or classes to figure out the device or learn apps. In fact, apps are so user-friendly, many children learn through experimental play. Best of all, apps are fun - appealing and engaging.
Share the Wealth
Ask your therapists if they have favorite iPad apps to suggest. If they don't, suggest your favorites to them. Ask your schools if they're integrating iPad learning into the classroom. Apps for Babies, Toddlers, Preschoolers, Elementary, Middle and High School age and older are popping up, popping smiles and popping skills!
Autism Hangout Special Reports by Craig Evans.
An enlightening interview with Moms With Apps founder, Lorraine Akemann:
Craig Evans interview featuring Shannon DeRoches Rosa, a California mom who documented her 9 year old son's miraculous interaction with an iPad:
Check outhttp://www.babieswithipads.blogspot.com/ for more video examples of iPads utilized with Autistic children. This site is a video documentation of the work of a talented developmental/vision specialist. She uses the iPad to help infants and toddlers with special needs. This is helpful to watch the children interact with technology.
Great site! Thanks for sharing your work. Thanks also to the children and their families for letting us share your incredible experience. I really wish her site had a search feature by disability, age, and/or app.
http://www.bubblesmakehimsmile.com/2010/09/apps-for-autism.html
This mom's site has an extensive list of apps for ASD grouped into uses. Apps for Social Goals, Apps for Communication, Apps for Behaviour, Relaxation, and Structure, Apps for Sensory Issues, Apps for Functional Issues, Apps for Productivity, Apps for Organization, and Apps for Academics
So helpful! I'm going to explore new finds n the "Apps for Sensory Issues" category. Her list includes:
Still saving...I'm hoping to get G's iPad for his upcoming 5th birthday, maybe Christmas...I'd love to claim ownership of my iTouch again someday. For now he's welcome to it, he's loving it! ;p Happy App-ing!
I've got that newborn baby proud mama excitement! For 3 years, I've been dropping off my older 2 children at Tae Kwon Do 4-6 times per week.. Every couple of months, I'd try to take G in to watch them, with disastrous, frustrating, embarrassing results. See http://allinadaysquirks.blogspot.com/2010/07/jumping-gs.html Now that G has started TKD and he's doing better at engaging and not running out the door, it's possible to take him to watch my older kids in their class occasionally.
I've missed so much of their practice and hard work. They've worked their way up to only 2 belts away from black belt. Now I get to see the really spectacular stuff - also exciting and motivating for G, more engaging. I love to watch their routines, marvel at how high they can kick! I still get to go through from the bottom up with G to see that learning process, so it worked out in life's strange way.
I get the giddy, new mama proud feeling and my kids get 2 energetic new cheerleaders. I've so often felt guilty that I haven't been there to watch them through their progression in this year-round, demanding sport. I'm making up for lost time! What a great feeling it is to give them some positive kudos in an area that was entirely closed off to me for 3 years. While not quite as momentous as their first smile or first time they said "mama", it is a first step, a milesone step for all of us.
N and M are training for an upcoming local demonstration. Here's awesome shots of my 11 year old jumping over 4 kids to break a board. So cool!
My10 year old daughter in front watches her big brother make his jump!
Pretty much since G's been able to walk, he's been a runner. I joke that he was late to walk (14 mos.), but then he made up for lost time by just getting up and running. Fast. With therapy, sensory diet, hard work and maturity, he's made improvements in his impulsivity and running away, but we still have to be vigilant and stay right with him. Every time I give him 20 feet he takes a mile - so to speak, and runs into the road when I least expect it. He rarely hears me shouting to stop or any other key words/phrases that we've tried. Corners are the worst. We have power play battles at every corner. He's getting better at stopping, I start my stop commands about 50 feet in advance. But at times he'll go 5 feet into the street, halfway across, or even just a couple of steps, then look back with a grin. I just can't seem to get the seriousness of the consequences of running into the street into his bright little mind. I've stepped up the drama and urgency in my explanations. I've moved from talking about getting hurt, breaking bones, to going to hospital, to dying. Nothing seems to hit home with him. Lately he's a bit obsessed with emergency vehicles so injuries, ambulances and hospitals take on an exciting prospect for him.
Every few months I give up the battle and retreat to the back yard instead of playing in the front yard or venturing out into the neighborhood. I've been working on it more intensely over the summer until now, hoping repetition will finally work. It's worked with other dangerous behaviors, but I'm still diligently working and waiting for the light bulb to illuminate. I welcome any tips to combat our street battle. At times he turns it into a game, but mostly he simply lacks judgment and is unpredictably impulsive. Sigh. This too shall be overcome eventually I hope. I pray.
So, I was ready for a laugh today, overdue. Once again on our way home from picking up his big brother at the bus stop, G ran ahead 20 feet and right into the street, ignoring my commands. I got him to come back, face me and look at me (ok, head faced in my general direction). Here's how the conversation went...
G, you crossed the road without looking!
What could happen? I could die.
That's terrible! Would Mama be sad? Yes
Would Daddy be sad? Yes
Would (sister) M be sad? Yes
Would (brother) N be sad? No
Gotta love the honesty! Of course his big brother would be sad, but G feels the typical brotherly rivalry. Thanks for the laugh, G! I brake for autism, I also brake for laughs. Often!
Please don't retouch my wrinkles. It took me so long to earn them.
~Anna Magnani
While shopping in the produce section last week, my 11 year old son N whispered to me, "Did you see her? She's really old!"
I followed his (thankfully) discreet nod to a woman easily in her late 90's. Her stooped spine and hunched shoulders carried a shawl over a long dark dress as she shuffled along in her practical black shoes. She wore a babushka over wisps of thin white hair, her sunken face corrugated with deep ridges of her life's canvas. An artist's dream.
I smiled and explained how special it was to see her out and about, still shopping and getting around at her age.
A few minutes later he told me, "B's Grandma is really old like that, too. You should see her!"
"Oh, I didn't realize she was that old," I wondered, haven't met her yet.
"Yeah, she is," he mused, "Well...I think maybe a month younger."
Love it!
Also last week while waiting for the schoolbus, G was wondering out loud if there would be a birthday celebration at school that day. I quizzed him on the ages of his friends and family, some right, some wrong. When I asked him how old I am, "He immediately responded, "5!" (like duh, Mom!)
I'm going to count that as an excellent sign that he considers me his peer, since we're working on Play Project, SonRise-inspired techniques. lol
With mirth and laughter let old wrinkles come.
~William Shakespeare
